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Ascentia Partners, LLC |
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Building business by inspiring the human spirit |
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Thought for the Day |
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At the end of the day, you are the sum of your reactions to all the little (and big) challenges life throws in front of you. To stay in your head, there is one thing you have to do: implement The 24 Hour Rule.
The 24 Hour Rule gets capitalized for a reason. I am not big on rules and I am definitely not a fan of structure, hierarchy, or limits of any kind. But this rule is a must have, must follow, and you will soon see why.
The 24 Hour Rule is required doing for anyone wanting to make a change in their life. There is not anything outside of a medical or legal emergency that cannot wait 24 hours (although I know that the situation may feel life threatening at the time).
So, if you feel your blood rising, your pulse quicken, your breath shorten (I get an adrenaline rush in my limbs), then stop and say, “Let me think about this. Can we talk about it tomorrow?” If the object of your recent attention happens to be in a nearby car on the freeway, I am sure they will appreciate it. The 24 hour rule beats the finger you were about to point in their direction.
The reason that I emphasize the 24 Hour Rule is that to take any kind of control over your thoughts, you have to have the presence of mind to know what you are thinking. I know because I have… shall we say… a reactive personality, inclined toward speaking out now and regretting later.
Paying attention to your thoughts, your perspectives, and your reactions requires a large degree of self-awareness. While not explicitly valued in our culture, self-awareness is required for any kind of productive, healthy relationship. You have got to take responsibility for your own sh…stuff to manage people, have meaningful relationships, and advance in any arena of life.
If self-awareness is not your strong suit, the key to fostering it is to create more mental space in your life. Time for reflection is required to keep anyone sane. So carve out some time for yourself where you can be quiet and reflect, especially on a 24-hour Rule Day. Exercise, walks, journal writing, meditation, a quiet commute home. Turn the radio off and please don’t make me tell you not to drive and talk on your phone. Make a commitment to some time to reflect and get to know yourself each day.
That being said, the whole point of the 24 Hour Rule and self-awareness is to get back into your own head. Once you have the perspective of knowing who you are, where you are, what you are thinking, and what you are saying, you are ready to leave your anger behind and take on a higher level of thinking. Getting there is no trivial task. But who wants to cruise through life as a reactionary robot?
Once you have taken some time to cool off, every situation looks different. As you know, a good night’s sleep dramatically changes perspective.
If you get in your head and decide that you have been a jerk – thank goodness you figured it out now! Make quick work of it and say you are sorry. We have all been there.
The bottom line of getting back in your own head is that you want to be at your best. In your own head, you can validate and reinforce your best characteristics. Your self-esteem and self-worth are no one’s judgments to make but your own. Take 24 hours to ensure that you act from your best.
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The 24 Hour Rule helps you respond appropriately to stressful conflicts |
Wednesday |
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The 24 Hour Rule |
